I wrote the following after my Sept/Oct'04 trip to Hokkaido. It's a letter to my 2 jie-meis, but i'd like to share it with anyone who reads my blog.... so i've done slight modifications to it b4 uploading....
I’m hopeless with maps & very blur...Going on a trip alone was an exciting but VERY SCARY idea. Had countless sleepless nights planning & re-planning... trying to find someone who could go with me although I wished no one could! And to think that I dreamed of a solo trip around whole of Japan 3 yrs ago! I must have been nutz then...no... I still am...hahaha...
Looking back, I’m glad I did it. And I’m lucky that I returned safe and sound. What I went thru or did... still astonishes me... The ferry trip isn’t really that bad... it sure sounds like hell on paper (39hrs), but it’s nothing... since ½ the time’s spent sleeping, leaving very little time to feel bored. The killer’s the connecting bus rides to Hakodate.... barely survived it.... I was on autopilot mode on arrival.... What was I thinking then? Should’ve learnt my lesson during the Europe trip’s overnight trains & Tokyo’s overnight bus trip that such “accommodations” will zap a person’s energy completely....and it’s amazing that I could still go sightseeing the day I arrived.
Next crazy thing I did.... climbing a mountain when the last time I did something similar was during uni days at our little Bt Timah hill! I thought it’s going to be just another long boring walk up flights of muddy, seasoned steps.... I was soooo wrong! It was HELL! Wanted to give up... but yet didn’t want to.... I’ve started the climb and wanted to complete it.... but could I do it? Was my determination strong enough?
Anyway, why do people love climbing? There’s nothing to see along the way except rocks, trees and roots! But I was lucky to have met my 1st guardian angel on this journey.... he must be thinking that I’m gonna get myself killed at the way I’m going... hahaha... But having someone to talk to & follow helped take my mind off the thought of quitting... reaching the summit.... the sense of satisfaction....indescribable....Then came the time to descend.... I wonder what’s worse, ascending or descending? Judging by how clumsy I am, it’s a miracle that I descended safely....w/o pulling anyone else down with me!
4 hrs of flipping burgers continuously & regularly sure helped trained my stamina... coz I continued on with 3 hrs of cycling after that climb. Could’ve been shorter but as expected, I lost my way when the route’s so damn easy to follow! But one can’t blame me for being more adventurous and going beyond what the bicycle owner recommended, rite? ;p Went cycling at Kushiro... and same thing happened... haiz.... I should seriously reconsider venturing out to unfamiliar areas on my own.... a map’s not gonna be handy for me....
We’ve been drilled in mind since young never to talk to strangers, rite? I not only talked to many strangers, I went out alone with them.... not that it’s a problem since I’m no longer a kid, but I’m a solitary female and they are guys. I’ve read lotsa warnings in guidebooks against hitchhiking for solitary females.... so I dropped the idea though I was tempted to try.... BUT I must have been possessed to actually agree to rent a car and go exploring an area I know nutz about with an almost complete stranger. My intuition told me he’s not a baddie since he’s that 1st guardian angel. It was a very fun & memorable day that I’d never forget.... although 1-full day of Jap conversation was quite overwhelming, on the whole I felt pretty comfortable.... was really reluctant & sad to part...but well.... that’s life....partings/endings are inevitable, rite?
The encounter that freaked me out most is with that uncle in Hakodate. The thought of it still freaks me out now... my intuition already told me he’s weird.... that’s why I ignored him in the beginning, but I finally took his offer of a ride round the area. I felt quite uneasy but since he was nice enough to drive me to nice picture-taking spots.... I gave him the benefit of the doubt. But it was a BIG mistake to agree to go out with him again at night. I was mad....testing my luck... if intuition tells u something is not rite.... should follow it! But I didn’t.....
He brought me to an isolated nite spot to view Hakodate’s nite view from a different angle. There were some “couple’s cars” there.... I thought after that we will move off to the touristy Mt Hakodate.... but he didn’t want to go yet. Kept saying it’s still early (for your info, it’s pitch-dark at 8.45pm there) All of a sudden, he went out to the back of his car saying he had something to do and that I needn’t get out.... I was getting really scared.... he wasn’t at his car boot.... he was near the bushes... what was he up to? (maybe he’s having a pee... but still....) I started looking around for the best possible escape route.... where the nearest car I could run to for help etc.. (damned! I forgot to bring my soap spray that nite!!)
When he came back, he lowered his seat to view the sky from the car (duh?!!) and suddenly tried to lower mine too!!! AND he asked whether I could give him a peck on his cheeks / or vice-versa.....I can’t figure out (my jap’s hopeless) I totally FREAKED OUT! I was almost gonna run out of the car already... but I kept my cool... joked with him a little.... coz I figured that if I showed too much fear, it might turn out worse.... Then he tried to take pic of me....kept saying I’m cute.... my goodness.... how perverted can a person get?!! But luckily nothing happened.... he finally drove us to Mt Hakodate.... phew! I guess I “escaped harassment” coz the owner of the inn met him when he came to fetch me..... if anything happened to me, there’s someone who can recognize him... or so I thought.... No doubt I’m grateful to him for bringing me to places for nice shots.... but he freaked me out so much that I dun really wanna have anything else to do with him... Sighz.... I’m really dumb!
This incident aside, I met many other nice people along the way. This is the best part about traveling alone. It’s easier to make friends compared to being in a group. And I think being a female helped too.... people tend to see us as being harmless so they are more receptive towards us.....but we can end up as easy targets too. The most amazing encounter I had was meeting the 2 gals at Otaru.....my next 2 guardian angels..
First met them at the hostel in the evening, didn’t really talk to them coz we were all half-dead when we met. Anyway, I told the owner the next morning that I wanna cancel my reservation for that nite and take an overnight bus to Kushiro. As fate would have it, the gals were heading back to Kushiro that day and they overheard my conversation with him. And they readily offered me a ride there and started helping me search for accommodation, and offering me a nite’s stay at their apartment when they realized the hostels available weren’t that conveniently located. I thought I was dreaming... offering a ride is ok.... but accommodation?!!
We understood each other & got along pretty well despite my poor command of the Jap lang.... 2 days later we had dinner together, went karaoke, did crazy poses for pictures... another memorable day....The most difficult part was saying goodbye.... sensed that they were holding back their tears... never expected that I’d be so emotional too.... the moment I drew the bus’s curtain... burst into tears... guess I cried for a full hour till I was too tired to go on.... touched by person’s kindness & friendship and feeling the pangs of loneliness....guess it was just too much for me then coz I had a similar parting experience just days before that......
I feel that this is like a self-discovery trip for me..... discovered more about myself and my surroundings.....here’s what I’ve learnt....
I learnt I can survive pretty well on my own, in fact enjoy the time alone ~ natural loner? Maybe...but yet I do crave for company sometimes.... for someone to share my joys with.....
I learnt that I do possess some raw guts or maybe I was just plain nutz....
I learnt that I have pretty good stamina or maybe I should attribute it to me not having much choice when I lose my way or need to save on transport/accommodation!
I affirm that fact that I am hopeless with maps but I can recognize my way back.
I realized that I like nature (and photography of nature) more than I thought so
I realized that I seldom feel hungry (and never thirsty!) when on the move.....probably coz my mind’s on what’s coming up next.....
I learnt to be more vocal, less shy and more sociable.... in the past, I could’ve never imagined myself making the first move to approach someone to talk to....or telling a stranger my dumb life-story, and not being afraid to make a fool of myself conversing in broken Jap.... (but this reminds me that I need more conversational practice!)
I realized that although I prefer things to be organized and on schedule, I kind of enjoyed the flexibility and frequent changes on this trip. Almost nothing was on schedule... hahaha... but yet I enjoyed every bit of it ~ the surprises.... I had no idea how to get from one location to another but surprisingly I wasn’t really worried.... though having to catch the last/only train/bus did worry me sick sometimes....
I realized that there are many nice people around....and weird people too....
And there are many independent Jap ladies contrary to what I thought....probably those I’ve known before are sheltered and gave me the impression that Jap gals dun travel alone... but this trip showed me otherwise... And there are many independent ladies out there! I’m most impressed with Ms Emirates for her guts and strength in traveling alone with no knowledge of Jap and with an almost 20kg backpack on her petite frame.....
Despite the $$ spent (and me having to work everyday to make up for it!), I do not regret it. This has been an extremely fulfilling trip for me even though it was just about a week long (minus the time on ferry). It has given me the encouragement to embark on more of such trips... to see the world.... to discover myself.... to discover what’s out there in store... Life’s too boring to be studying / working for the sake of a living.... I wouldn’t want my life to be memories of working to earn more $$ for a comfortable lifestyle, but rather that to be full of memorable memories and unforgettable experiences.... Even though reality is harsh, it’s a dream that I’m working towards to.....
Bao – Oct 17, 2004
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