My White's Day gift!

One month after Valentine's Day is White's Day. This is the day where the guys have to give the gals a gift in return. Like I've mentioned previously, I don't know if the guy still needs to give the gal anything if he don't like her even if she gave him chocolate on V-day.

Anyway, my bf HAS to give me something 'else he'll get hell from me. So here it is... my White's Day gift. A teddy bear & a real leaf.

Little bear is sitting comfortably on my desk at home while the leaf is dying off beside it. My 7 little piggies on my desk finally get to meet other animals : )

His parents' objections

Just wana add on to my previous post on what other things his parents said, showing their subtle objections. Took me some time to get over the shock...

Before my bf told me to go for matchmaking in S'pore, his dad told me already in a 4-person talk, he & his parents & me. It's as if I'm there to discuss marriage & make their precious son leave for S'pore with me!

As mentioned previously, they said things like i'll be lonely etc etc.... then they added on that standing from the viewpoint of MY parents, they understand that my parents would surely want me to marry a fellow S'porean instead because we're in the same country, same culture etc. So they said during the next 3 - 4 yrs while my bf is studying, if my parents arrange matchmaking sessions/arrange marriage for me in S'pore, they & their son will be understanding. "You can always come back here for holidays. We'll welcome you... because you're cute... "

I didn't know how to react to it. If i'm being sensitive & read in between lines, i take it as their subtle objections to us being together. Otherwise I take it as they're trying to be understanding towards my parents & I.

Throughout the talk, my bf & his mum kept quiet. It's so typical of a traditional family where only the father talks. After that he ended the talk, saying sometimes really fated in life on whom we'll meet...

Post-talk... my bf didn't add on anything when we're alone... until 2 days later, of which u can read what he said in my previous post. I'm pretty sure now he's on my side, no longer influenced by his parents for now....

Is this love?

I’m back in Japan again to spend time with my dear, and what a better time than now to make the trip here! He’s waiting for the outcome of his exams, his future, our future...

It doesn’t seem like we’ll be receiving any good news, and he’s very affected by it. Who wouldn’t be? Time and again his hopes were dashed. This is his 4th or 5th attempt? If he fails, it’s another year of trying. I really admire his determination & perseverance ~ I’d have given up long ago. Maybe this is the characteristics of a Taurus? However this determination (or some call it plain stupid stubbornness) is causing everyone, including himself, unhappiness.

We’ve discussed about our future a couple of times, but the plans kept changing because of the uncertainty of his own future. We discussed this again few days ago, with unexpected reaction from both parties.

He told me it’ll take 3 – 4 years for him to graduate and start working. He wanted me to go for matchmaking sessions in Singapore during this period. Yes, matchmaking sessions! Apparently in Japan, there is still such practice by parents. He gave the promise that he wouldn’t be involved with anyone during the 3 – 4 years, but hoped I’ll go and meet other S’porean guys. How would you feel if your boyfriend told you this? Am I supposed to take this as a break-up or as a permission to cheat on him?

I really wish to settle down soon. My family aside, I really want to love and care for another person, to live a meaningful life together. And not forgetting having my own family too! He’s the only one whom I feel so strongly about now, someone whom I want to spend the rest of my life with. But can I, or we, stand the test of time & distance, test of culture & language barriers? And can we convince our family to accept us?

His parents don’t seem to approve of us. They reminded me that I’ll be all alone in this foreign land & can’t go back when things go wrong. They reminded me that life here is different from life back home where I’ve maids to serve me. Here, I’m expected to be the housewife and do all chores myself. My parents also raised the same concerns. I really don’t understand. Do they think that I’ll live a similar lifestyle if I married a local? Maybe yes if I married a rich guy, but other than that, I’ll probably be slogging at work for a similar lifestyle or be a housewife at home. So what’s the difference? Distance. If only Japan is just across the causeway!

I refuse to give up on this. Just like how “possessed” I was then to agree to wait for him when he initially didn’t want to start the relationship (because of his uncertain future), I’m still “possessed”. I believe everything in life is fated, though we ourselves play a part in controlling our fate. It’s fated that we met and started this wonderful relationship. If it’s fated that I’ll meet someone else in S’pore, I’ll see if my love for him is strong enough to control my fate.

Everyone will praise their own partner, and I’m no exception. I’ve never come across someone more caring & loving than him. When I cried upon his suggestion to meet other guys, he cried along with me. When I refused & said the simplest but most touching words I never knew I’m capable of, he cried & thanked me. We'll go through this tough journey & survive it together to achieve our happiness....

Think our story can be made into a love movie? (^-^)

Valentine's Day ~ Attached but Alone

After being single for donkey years, I can finally celebrate this commercially-driven special day with my special other half........ in my dreams! Haiz...we're so far away from each other *sob sob*

Anyway we celebrated it the Japanese way --> sending him chocolates. Did you know that in Japan the female will give choco to the guys on V-day? For male colleagues/classmates the gals will buy normal off-the-shelf choco. It's given out of obligation so it's called "Gi-ri choco".

If it's for a special guy, it's home-made choco. Many use it to confess their feelings. The weeks leading up to V-day, departmental stores will sell the utensils/ingredients to make choco & one will see groups of girls shopping for gifts there. So what do the guys do? Eat & grow FAT!! hehehehe

One month later on "White Day" the guy is supposed to give the gal gift 3x the value of what he received from her during V-day. If he doesn't reciprocate her feelings, I'm not sure if he still has to give her anything. And do guys have to give gifts out of obligation too? hmm... not sure too....

Since my dear is a Japanese, it makes more sense to celebrate it the Japanese way, right? (^-^) So I sent him a bar of chocolate. It wasn't normal choco hor!! I spent the whole afternoon in Orchard searching for the perfect one. He doesn't sweet choco. So those with liquor was top on my list but no stock. Next was white choco coz he likes white choco. But most white choco came in boring cheapo packaging. I finally found the perfect one at The Cocoa Tree at Paragon. White choco with coffee (he's a coffee lover) in classy packaging. And it's light too (remember postage to Japan isn't cheap!!). Quite an expensive thin family bar of choco at S$12 but good choco dun come cheap so it's worth it, esp since it's for him (^-^)(^o^) Of course he's happy. He HAS to be 'else I'd blow my top!! That pig apparently finished the whole bar with his parents in a day. HAhaha...

Okay, how did I spend my actual V-day? I wanted to go aerobics. Then a male colleague asked me out for dinner. I was a little taken aback coz I hardly know him. Rejected him initially but later in the evening agreed when he said there were a few others joining. We went for dinner at the 居酒屋 I was talking about in my previous entry. We ate & drank a lot & talked lots of nonsense too. After that we went for some more drinks at a pub. Quite an interesting V-day where I didn't feel lovesick...

Monthly updates - Work

No updates for exactly a month! Not that I've been busy.... I'm just l-a-z-y....

It's been a short but eventful month. There was a 2-day dept team-building event @Sentosa in early Feb. We played a few games to foster team spirit. Don't remember what we played. Not too memorable. I had an exam the next day, so didn't stay for the 2nd day which I heard was much more boring than Day 1. Phew! I escaped that! hehehehe

Haiz, actually I feel there isn't a need to spend a bomb to engage in such team-building event. Yes, we'll feel more like team & foster better relations but that'll probably last for that few days. Once we're back at work, it'll all be gone. Frustration levels escalate & tempers flare when things go wrong. Who'd care about team spirit at this time?

As of last week, I'm back to my usual boring job after they recruited someone more senior in. Quite sad to hand-over everything else coz during the 2 mths I held this portfolio, I learnt a lot & managed to build a rapport with some of the managers. Anyway, looking on the bright side, I should be glad that I'm paid quite a lot to do dumb stuff. It's no secret that I'm looking out for better opportunities! Unfortunately no luck so far....

Remember I said I had an exam? It's the practicum for my Cert in TEFL course. I had to teach a class of 3 foreign students any topic (as long as it's on English). It'd seem more appropriate to teach grammer / vocab since it's an English class we're talking about, but i chose to teach directions. It's one of the most interesting lessons I had when I was learning Japanese, so I felt it'll be fun for english students too. It's also easy to teach in terms of just explaining "turn left, turn right, go straight". The challenge was in preparing the worksheets & getting the students interested in the map reading game. I was lucky that the students were sporting & participated. Of course I was nervous! Not only were there 3 students, my lecturer was there with the invigilator, 2 observers & my 2 classmates. Imagine having 6 pairs of eyes looking at how u manage a small class of 3! Not sure how I fared for it......still waiting for results...

My bf's cousin who runs 2 English language schools in Japan called me recently to discuss a teaching vacancy she had in her school. I was so excited! Finally I have a chance to teach!! Sad to say, seems like my lack of experience working with young children & teaching English dashed the chances.... So now I'm still looking out & applying for part-time teaching jobs in S'pore instead. If not I'll just keep my teaching cert for use when I settle down in Japan (^-^)